I was trying to round up babysitters yesterday for this weekend and was wishy-washy on what all I was going to do because I feel guilty leaving Tylee. My mom told me, "Motherhood is all about guilt so get used to it." Tylee is only a month old and I can already vouge that is 100% true. Yesterday I wanted to take a shower and get around so we could go to Wal-mart but Tylee was awake. She was happy so I went ahead and got in the tub but felt guilty the whole time because I wasn't talking to her. She was just laying there in her bouncy seat looking around all by herself. I should've been interacting with her while she was awake but I was selfish and went ahead and bathed. Are you kidding me? I feel guilty because I took a shower when my baby was awake. Shoot me now, I'm a horrible mother. Haha. But it's so true! There are already a million other times I've felt guilty over piddly little stuff like that.

We want to go to the Demo Derby Friday night but have a wedding Saturday night and I don't want to leave her two nights in a row. I really want to go do both things and can't decide which one I want to skip. The other part of me thinks that I should do both because I am home with her 24/7 and it will be healthy for me to go out and do something non-baby. I know it'll be different when I'm back to work full-time and am not home with her everyday. Then I will definately want to soak up as much Tylee-time as I can on the weekend but for now, I'm home all week so what will a few hours on Friday and an evening away Saturday night hurt?

It sounds so good and logical on paper but when it comes time to actually make the plans to go ahead with everything, here comes the guilt again!


I just can't help myself!

Doing A Little Jig

Wake-up routine...


Busy, Busy Bees

We had a wedding this past Saturday night and Tylee was a little ham. She was awake the whole reception and was passed around the table like a hot potato. She just stared and smiled at everyone who held her. Tj and I couldn't decide if we should take the car-seat in or if we should just carry her. I told him we could just carry her if he would be sure to help me hold her. I think we had her for a total of minutes from the time we walked in the door until we left. Actually, until she peed all over Tj's friends' Mom. Then they passed her back to us. :-) It may be time to move out of the newborn diapers.

We went to Chanute today to visit my family. It was a great day. We got to spend some quality time with everyone without feeling rushed. We also had our first walk! (There is a downside to living in the country because we can't push the stroller on gravel.) Brecca, Braylee, Grandma Ann, Tylee, and I walked down to Nanny's office to visit. It was a little farther than we initially thought but it wasn't too hot as long as we were in the shade. Tylee, however, got all sweaty and messed up her hair. I added a water bottle and a brush to my Wal-mart list for the next hair emergency.
Things are still going really good at the Trollope household. Tylee has still been sleeping all night and I've been trying to take advantage of her early bedtime. She's slept from 9pm until 5am the last 4 or 5 nights. I feed her at 5am, lay her back down, and I go back to sleep. It bothers me to lay her back down when she is wide awake but not bad enough to stay up and talk to her. She puts herself back to sleep and wakes up 3-4 hours later. I hope this routine continues when I go back to work in a few weeks. We've been busy but that is a good sign that life is getting back to normal. We went and ate breakfast the other day, we've had people over and barbecued, we went to the bar the other night, and went on the boat this weekend (without Tylee). We have a full agenda this week and are extra busy next weekend. Tj has a "play date" tomorrow since Tylee and I "played" all day today and I'm looking forward to spending the whole day at home with my girl.


Smile Session


Bad Day

This has been my day ALL day.
First things first. Tylee is smiling! She has been smiling for about a week now. I started to post about it the first time I got her too but I read that babies don't smile until 12 weeks. At that point, I thought I was jumping the gun a little and figured I better wait and see if it happened again. I finally got some witnesses and they agreed...she is smiling. (I wouldn't be so sure because one of the witnesses was Daddy and I think he is partial but Jennifer and Kinzi have both seen it and I think they agree?) I haven't had the camera handy when she is doing it and usually I'm the one making her smile so I need someone else to take the photos. I also asked the doctor yesterday if they could be real smiles and he said it is possible for babies to have responsive smiles at 4 weeks. "Especially for Mama," he said. :-)

Her one month check-up went great. She weighed 9 lbs 15 oz. I figured she weighed more than that since she is such a little piggy but no such luck. She is in the 75th percentile for height, weight, and head circumference. And it looks like the cold is just going to have to take its course. He said just to use the saline drops to get her nose cleaned out and unplugged but her lungs sounded fine.

Tylee slept from 9pm until 5am last night. So why didn't I go to bed until midnight? Of course the first time she sleeps all night just happens to be when we have people over and I don't get to bed when she does. I was shocked when she woke me up and it was 5am. Boy was she hungry!

Dutch hasn't been feeling any love on the blog lately



10 down, 10 to go!!

Actually: 35 down and 10 to go but I didn't work to lose the first 25. Funny how that works. I gained 45 pounds during my pregnancy and this is the first time I'm not too embarrassed to post that. I weighed in the hospital the day after I delivered and had only lost 2 pounds. I was like, "How did I have a 8lb 8 oz baby and only lose 2 pounds?" But my legs and feet were really swolen so I knew I was retaining a lot of water. I waited 3 weeks after having her before I went back to Weight Watchers. I wanted to get my breastmilk established and who am I kidding...I wanted to eat whatever I wanted for just a few more weeks. Plus, I knew my body was still getting back to normal and I wouldn't be losing because I was eating right.

My first week back to Weight Watchers I had gained exactly 20 pounds since my last weigh-in. I was pleased with that and knew that would come off fast since I was breastfeeding. I followed the program all last week and even ate before I went to weigh-in last night. I was shocked when I stepped on the scale and she told me I had lost 10 pounds!! I was on cloud 9 and called Tj, my mom, my sister, and my grandma ASAP.

Then I started thinking something might not be right. :-( I'm weighing on my scale at home and I haven't lost anywhere close to 10 pounds. Actually, the scale at Weight Watchers was about 4 pounds lower than what my scale read when I got home. My scale at home has always been lower than the scale at WW. Always. Maybe she weighed me wrong? Maybe I didn't lose anything at all and she read the 1st number wrong? Maybe my home scale needs new batteries? I dunno. So we'll see what happens next week but assuming everything is correct, I only have 10 pounds to lose before I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight. I definately don't look the same because things have shifted around a tad bit but just to know that I'm so close is very, very motivating.


These are for Aunt Lindsey because I know she checks this 100 times a day. Kinzi brought us some berrets but you can't see it very well. It looks really cute though. Thanks Kinz.


Baby Miller

Please send your prayers to Baby Sophie and her parents, Jennifer and Kenny.


Sophie was diagnosed on October 29, 2007 at 19 weeks gestation with a Congenital Diaphragmatic Hernia (CDH) during a routine ultrasound. CDH is a life threatening birth defect with an overall survival rate of 50-60%. Sofia was born March 10, 2008, spent 12 days on ECMO (heart & lung bypass), had 3 surgeries, and finally came home after 81 days in the NICU.

Sophie has reherniated and is preparing for another surgery.

Back in Action

Well, I finally got enough courage yesterday to drink a beer. Yes, it took courage. It was such a weird feeling. I've been wanting one for about, oh, 3 weeks (or 9 months) now but felt so guilty drinking one. I had milk saved and knew how long it would take for the beer to get out of my system but I still felt guilty. Until I took the first drink. Haha. Then I didn't feel guilty anymore. It was really good. Actually, it wasn't really the beer that was that great. It was the atmosphere and the fact that I was participating with everyone else. It's been a long 9 months watching everyone else partake while I sat on the sideline. It just felt good to be included again.

We also have our first illness in the making. I've had a cold for a few days now and had been praying that Tylee didn't get it. Too little, too late. She woke up this morning with a stuffy nose. It wasn't too bad but I could hear her all stuffed up when she was sucking on her pacifier and breathing through her nose. I felt so bad for her. I almost called the doctor but was hesitant because I don't want to be one of those parents. We had our morning feed, bath, and went to Grandmas so that I could go to the dentist. She really seemed to be feeling better so I decided we'd just see what happened. Now that the doctors office is closed and it's getting close to bedtime...here come the sniffles and they are even worse than before! Tj is on his way to Wal-mart to get some saline and some Tylenol. Keep your fingers crossed for a sleep-filled night.

And now...more pictures of Tylee.


Pretty in Purple

We haven't had any "homeade" pictures posted in a few days so we took a few today. I only got 3 cutes ones and my camera was blurry on one.

Look at that belly!!


Jibber Jabber

I had my first night away from Tylee tonight. As you can see by the time on the post, it's 7:30 and I'm already home. Kinzi and I went and ate dinner and Tj babysat all by himself! Tylee was asleep in her swing when I left and is asleep in her swing as I type...I don't think she made a peep the whole time. I was on cloud 9 as I drove down the driveway without her and then instantly felt guilty cause I was so happy to leave. Tj and I are going to try to go to dinner and have a night away soon but it just hasn't worked out with his work schedule and babysitters.

I had my 1st moment today where I missed being pregnant. I actually touched my belly to feel the baby and realized that she was in the backseat. Haha. A song came on that I used to sing to her when I was pregnant and it was strange that she wasn't inside my tummy anymore. Once I reached the point in my pregnancy that I knew she could hear me, I always loved to sing to her on my way to and from work. I guess I can still sing to her in the car...it probably isn't near as pleasant though now that it isn't muffled. :-)

We also had our first mishap with Dutch this past week. I was on the computer and Tylee was asleep in her Boppy on the couch. I knew Dutch was up there but he has been fine so I don't worry about him being close to her. I heard some scratching and him wimper and then Tylee started screaming. I peeked over the couch and Dutch's ball was right next to her hand. He had set it there and wanted her to throw it. When you don't throw it for him, he'll paw at your hand until you do. I felt bad for Tylee but thought it was so cute of Dutch. He at least realized that she is human but apparently doesn't understand why she can't play ball yet.


Beautiful Baby Girl

Tylee had her newborn pictures this week. Here are a couple and if you'd like to see more, you can check them out on Roxie's Website. I, of course, don't like the ones with me in them...I think my face still looks fat. Tj thinks the one with the cover over her diaper makes her butt look big. :-) I couldn't be happier with the pictures. I think they are better than perfect.

(Several people have already asked...no, I wasn't nervous putting her on those towels. I was holding her and then Roxie took my arm out of the photo.)


Maternity Leave

Things I thought I'd get to do while on maternity leave:
  • Go to lunch with friends
  • Email Chelsea
  • Go visit Twin Valley cause I was bored
  • Organize my closets
  • Work on Tylee's scrapbook
  • Update the blog daily
  • Go for walks
  • Cook really good meals
  • Lay out
  • Keep up with housework
  • Have people over for barbecues
  • Drink beer
  • Go shopping
  • Decorate Nursery

Things I've actually done while on maternity leave:

  • Feed Tylee
  • Bathe Tylee
  • Read to Tylee
  • Play with Tylee
  • Rock Tylee
  • Change Tylee
  • Bathe Myself
  • Put frozen pizza in oven
  • Got haircut
  • Ran into Wal-mart twice
  • Feed Tylee again,
  • and again,
  • and again.



Tylee's ambilical cord stub fell off last night so we got to have a real bath today! We were just giving sponge baths up until now and they weren't very fun. I hate greasy hair on babies (or adults) so we were giving sponge baths daily. Tylee enjoyed her bath! She didn't cry until the very end after she was all dried off and I put her lotion on. I even warmed it up in my hands but boy, did that make her mad!

Mean Daddy!

Mommy to the Rescue